Walking, Talking, Counting and Feeling Fine!

Or at least better... there will be daycare in our future - tomorrow even! It seems that our darling's many talents have expanded to include such magnificence as attempting a somersault, running at full speed, screaming the name of any old thing at all - at will, the return of tricky baby... she calls EVERYTHING DADDY (Mommy is not amused!) and can now count to 5 by herself. She is still reciting the alphabet and sometimes she gets past J all the way to P!! We truly have a brilliant baby.. eh?

She has developed a love of Oranges but, only when I peel it, pull apart the sections, de-pith it and bite it in half so she can get right to work on the inside. It's a tough job, but what's a Mommy to do? I am so relieved that she is finally, seemingly, on the mend and eating a bit. I tell you - a sick child is h#ll on earth. Really - I would rather be sick myself that have her sick at all. We had some really scary moments and it will be too soon the next time I hear her sneeze. I hope that her immune system is listening every time someone says to me that she will have perfect attendance once she is in school!

Have I mentioned her addiction to all things dippy? Yes, the new in thing here is sticking food in pools of something.. ketchup, mustard, gravy, applesauce, yogurt, hummus (!!??), both the garlic lovers and red pepper. EFP loves to have a little bowl of something and she understands the whole dipness factor - it is charming actually. Messy but charming. She also has been welcomed to the world of cheese and crackers - though she has not progressed beyond licking the cheese and discarding the crackers. I see in my future another little hors d'oeuvre lover like her big cousin Miss T. Can't wait till she eats spinach dip! LOL

I have also been caught defending myself as a 'real' mother more than once in the last few weeks - I suppose not me so much as all of us adopting parents. I am not sure why people feel they have a right to comment on other people's relationships, but they do. It also makes me wonder what they think about the nature of parent child relationship - do people believe they are so one-dimensional? Based on biology and nothing else? I suppose many people must - of course newborn are singularly dull (no offense to the newly born out there) so biology is all there is those first few months, well that and the exhausted haze that seems to lie over the abode of the new parents. I mean survival of the species demands that there be some reason to keep those little people safe and fed, right? Sure they are cute - also a survival mechanism - but what is there to like? So it stands to reason then that there is just the ONE reason - biological ties. I don't actually believe that there is only that - I am trying to figure out why people think that it is impossible to love a fully FORMED child vs a really really small one who sleeps, eats and poos on schedule . I mean MY child arrived with a personality AND the ability to stay awake for 5 - 7 whole hours at a time! She has been funny since day one, is very sweet and caring, sings and smiles in such a way as the Grinch himself would have to admit a bigger heart in her presence.

In fact it has become (painfully) obvious that it is possible to love a (or, dare I say, a few) children quite a bit - simply because they are. Naturally - I knew I would love EFP even from that first second I heard her name and saw her little face the first time. I mean we had waited so long and wanted this baby so much that we were primed (hmm.. a little like carrying something around for 9 months or so???) and ready - but it was so darn easy. Indeed, today I even went so far as to suggest that I love EFP better than I might have loved a bio child - since I feel so conflicted about my own genetics.... I suspect that it would be easier to be critical of a bio child (seeing your own flaws in a kid and all that) and to want to eradicate those tendencies that drive us crazy in ourselves. I think that in some ways it is possible to love the child as they are - I mean they come with their own innate personalities and we can take no credit for much of it. I mean - I will take full credit when she turns out to be an amazing adult etc. but it is fun trying to figure out what her talents will be - how she will turn the world upside down!

I don't think adoption is for everyone - really. I just knew it was for us and we couldn't be happier or more in love with who our daughter is and how she came to be in our family. I know that I can love any child the universe chooses to be ours (and some that are probably not) because every child deserves the love of a parent - born or adopted. I am thankful I am one of those who knows the importance of loving a child. Not just the ones related by genes.